By Mohammad Tamal, Frankfurt, Germany
When I first arrived in Germany, one of the things that impressed me the most was the deep-rooted culture of expressing gratitude. It’s not just a social norm—it’s an integral part of German life. From children to adults, from bus drivers to shopkeepers, everyone makes it a point to say “thank you” (Danke) for even the smallest gestures.
In fact, German parents teach their children a few essential words from a very young age, and guess what’s always on that list? Yes, the word Danke (thank you). Isn’t that beautiful?
At first, this habit seemed a bit unusual to me, but over time, I grew fond of it. In a world that often feels overwhelmed with stress and negativity, a simple thank you or a word of appreciation can make a significant difference. It doesn’t just acknowledge the act; it uplifts the spirit of both the giver and the receiver.
A Stark Contrast: Gratitude Back Home
On the flip side, I couldn’t help but compare this with the culture back in my home country. Many of us feel hesitant to say thank you, as if expressing gratitude somehow diminishes our self-worth. Some even behave as if they’re entitled to help, expecting assistance without feeling the need to acknowledge it.
But here’s the question: what do we lose by being polite and thankful? Absolutely nothing. In fact, a small gesture of gratitude can be incredibly motivating for the person who helped you.
I still remember a younger fellow from my university dorm who had this habit of thanking everyone—whether it was the rickshaw puller, the fish seller, or the household help. We used to laugh at him. In hindsight, how foolish we were!
Personal Experiences That Shaped My Perspective
Over the years, living in Germany has offered me numerous experiences that highlight the importance of gratitude—or the lack thereof. Let me share a few stories that left a lasting impression on me.
Incident 1: The Enrollment Fee Favor
Many Bangladeshi students face difficulties paying their university enrollment fees from back home, and naturally, I often receive requests to assist with these payments. I’ve helped at least 20 people with this, transferring money on their behalf and managing the process.
One particular case stood out. A student was in urgent need of help to pay his enrollment fee. I arranged the payment by borrowing Euros from someone else, and he quickly transferred the equivalent amount to my Bangladeshi account.
However, after the transaction, there was complete silence from his end. No thank you, no follow-up message, nothing. I even had to message him later to confirm whether his enrollment was successful because sometimes issues arise. His response? A blunt, “I’ve already sent the money, didn’t you receive it?”
“Yes, I did. Thank you,” I replied.
What baffled me more was that after he arrived at my university—living in the same city—we crossed paths multiple times, yet he never even acknowledged me with a simple greeting. Imagine that.
Incident 2: The Airport Pickup
Another time, I helped an acquaintance with everything—from guiding him through the application process to his successful visa approval. Did he bother sending a message to inform me he’d gotten the visa? No.
Fast forward a few months: he was finally coming to Germany and needed someone to pick him up from Frankfurt Airport. Since he didn’t know anyone else, he messaged me asking for help. I was irritated by his earlier indifference, but I thought, “Fine, let’s not hold grudges. It’s his first time here, and he’s probably nervous.”
I had classes that day, but I decided to skip one to help him out. I arrived at the airport at 1:30 PM, even though his flight was due at 2 PM. I’d already warned him that flights might get delayed, or there could be long queues at immigration. I asked him to keep me updated once he landed.
But after 2 PM, there was no message, no call. I tried reaching him several times—calls, texts—you name it. I even tracked the flight online, which showed it had landed on time. By 3:30 PM, I was genuinely worried. Frankfurt Airport is huge, and I thought he might be lost.
Finally, around 5 PM, he called. “Hey, I’m at the airport’s railway station. Are you coming?”
“I’ve been here for hours, waiting for you,” I replied.
When I met him, I discovered he had two other Bangladeshi acquaintances who’d also shown up to receive him. Apparently, he had asked three people to come, just in case.
I asked, “Why didn’t you respond to my messages or calls?”
“There was a crowd at immigration,” he replied nonchalantly.
Not an ounce of guilt or gratitude on his face—just indifference. I left the airport frustrated, mentally cursing my own foolishness.
Why Are We So Reluctant to Say Thank You?
These are just two of many experiences I could share. But they all raise the same question:
Why do we struggle to express gratitude?
What’s so hard about saying thank you when someone does something for you? Even to our own mothers—how often do we say, “Thank you, Mom, for bringing me into this world, for your unconditional love and care”?
Expressing gratitude doesn’t cost anything. On the contrary, it inspires the other person to continue doing good. Sure, the ultimate reward for any good deed comes from a higher power, but that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t acknowledge the efforts of those around us.
The Takeaway: A Simple Request
So here’s my humble request to everyone reading this:
Learn to say thank you.
It’s a small gesture, but it holds immense power. Whether someone helped you with information, supported you during tough times, or simply held the door open for you—acknowledge it. It makes a difference.
While living in Germany, I’ve realized that sometimes, you don’t need to move mountains to make the world a better place. Sometimes, all it takes is a simple word: Danke.
Thank you, Germany, for teaching me this invaluable lesson.
Key Takeaways:
- Gratitude is more than good manners; it’s a way of life.
- A simple thank you can inspire others to continue their kindness.
- Expressing appreciation doesn’t cost you anything, but it means everything to the person receiving it.
- Don’t wait for grand moments—practice gratitude in everyday interactions.
Related Keywords:
Gratitude in Germany, Importance of Saying Thank You, Cultural Differences in Gratitude, Personal Stories of Gratitude, How to Express Appreciation, Lessons from German Culture
This heartfelt post isn’t just about cultural observations—it’s a reminder that gratitude can transform relationships, communities, and even our own mental well-being. So, what’s stopping you from saying thank you today?